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George W. Bush - Christian in Chief - The Legacy of an American Failure

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The September 11th Presidential Fitness Quiz

See Whether You or Your Seven Year Old Could Exercise Better Judgment Than George W. Bush!

Situation One - America Under Attack
 
You are listening to young school children in one of your many photo-ops that are the mainstay of your presidency.  Suddenly, your Chief of Staff whispers in your ear that "America is under attack."  What do you do?
 
a) Continue with the photo-op and read to the children for another critical seven minutes as more Americans die.
 
b) Excuse yourself from the classroom for a "potty break."
 
c) Explain to the children that the President has some important business to attend to and leave the room.  Tell your Chief of Staff to get NORAD, the Secretary of Defense, the National Security Advisor, the FAA, the CIA and the FBI on a conference call immediately.  Establish an open line of communication with all of them, assess the situation and mobilize the air force.
 
d) Jump in the Presidential Limo and head for the airport even though you are at no immediate risk.  Board Air Force One and tell the pilot to get you as high up in the air as possible so you lose contact with the White House situation room in favor of trying to open a discussion with God.  Yon need God to give you instructions now!
 
e) Ask the principal of the school what she thinks you should do.
 
 

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Situation Two - Getting Saudis Home Safely After 9/11
 
After your crack intelligence agencies have quickly determine that most of the 9/11 hijackers responsible for the deaths of thousands of Americans were Saudi nationals, you get a call from your friends in the Saudi Arabian Royal Family asking you to help140 Saudis get out of the United States.  The Saudis are afraid that Americans will treat these individuals unkindly when they realize they are related to bin Laden or are connected with extremists groups. 
 
To complicate matters, the FBI wants to question some of these individuals because of their possible connection to anti-American groups that may have aided the terrorists.  To complicate matters further, you are well aware that every airport in the U.S. is closed to international travel for security reasons.  To complicate matters much further, you remember that the Saudis paid your dad more than $350 million dollars in consulting fees that he turned over to the RNC to help make you President.
 
As you share a fine Cuban cigar with Prince Abdullah of Saudi Arabia at the White House, you:
 
a)  Firmly explain to the Prince that there is no way in hell you will allow any Saudi nationals to leave the country until they are cleared by the FBI of any involvement.   
 
b)  Tell the Prince "no worries, mate.  I 'm the goddamn President and I can do whatever I want. Have your people contact my people and let them know what works best for your people. Consider it done." 
 
c)  Personally order airports across the United States to help the Saudis get home safely on private jets. Tell the FBI to relax. 
 
d)  Ask your mom for advice telling her that you really don't want to annoy daddy's friends.
 
e)  Remembering that "God helps those who help themselves," you give it a try and blurt out  "What's it worth to ya Prince?" 

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